“Don’t worry,” “it ‘s not a big deal” – these are usually the first words out of your partner’s mouth when your lovemaking comes to a sudden end. But what does she really think? Does she have any idea abouthow it feels to have to apologize forbeing unable to bring her to fulfillment?
It’s hard to know for sure… that’s why today’s article focuses on a very common problem for men: premature ejaculation. While there is no clear definition of exactly how little time constitutes “premature,” this term typically refers to an uncontrolled ejaculation taking place during the first several minutes of intercourse.
It is also important to note that this phenomenon is not a disease. However, it does cause disappointment and frustration, and can impact a couple’s sexual connection. If it is has been present since your first sexual experience, we refer to it as “primary premature ejaculation.” It will be classified as secondary if it appears suddenly and you have not experienced it in the past(in this case, it is most typically due to an emotional shock).
But what can you do to avoid it? Are there tricks to “last” longer? If interested … just read our tips below!
1.Set your mind free
You should know that premature ejaculation is often caused by fear of not being up to snuff,and disappointing your partner. This is therefore largely a psychological problem. To be most effective, one of the most common suggestions is to use visualization.
When you realize that you’re about to lose control, focus your mind on something that has no sexual connotation, something totally unattractive or even repulsive: your neighbor’s dog, a horde of zombies, etc. Imagine yourself doing the dishes or think about your grandmother! This simple mental process can work wonders!
However, it has the slight disadvantage of reducing your focus on the present moment. It’s achallengeto implement this visualization while keeping your eyes open… but extending the act is probably worth that little sacrifice, right?
2 Go back to foreplay
If you feel that you won’t be able to go the distance because of your over-excitement, you always have the option of pulling out for a few minutes. You can keep the sexual tensionintact by turning the focus to the pleasures you can bring her through oral sex, for example.
This will allow your penis to rest, to literally reduce the pressure, and ultimately help you feel less tense. Once you feel ready to return to the office, you can get back to work! This technique, though it may seem like “cheating.” is still very enjoyable for your partner, so there is relatively little chance of getting negative feedback. And if she asks why you are suddenly acting differently, tell her that her pleasure comes first and that this is something you want to do for her!
3.Control your breath
A bit like pregnant women during childbirth, controlling your breathing can be an effective method to help you hold your ejaculation. Take slow deep breaths, and try not to let the excitement go to your head (or to the rest of the body). This will help minimize the effects of your pleasure when you’re at the breaking point.
You can focus on your breathing and link it to the rhythm of your movements: exhale when you thrust and inhale while pulling out. If you use this method, you will feel the urge to ejaculate decrease, and you can then resume breathing at a more appropriate rhythm for the activity you’re engaged in (heavy breathing is turn-on for your partner).
4. Change positions
If ejaculation is close, feel free to try a new position. Switch to one where it will be easier to hold back. This depends on your own preferences. For me, I find doggie style much hotter than being on bottom, so I would choose the latter, inviting my partner to get on top. This will allow you to last longer, and won’traise any suspicions!
The trick is knowing when to change position. To do this, be sure not to exceed the so-called Point of No Return (the moment when, no matter what we do, we can’t hold back). Pay attention to what you’re feeling, and take advantage of the few seconds you get when changing position to take a deep breath and take a break.
5.Put on the pressure
This is an unconventional method we’re suggesting, but it seems to work, so why not use it? When you feel that the fateful moment approaching, pull out and apply pressure to the tip of your penis. It seems like a strange thing to do, but it’s very effective. This will help reduce the sensitivity you were experiencing during penetration.
Keep up a firm pressure until you feel the pressure in your penis decreasing. Don’t wait too long to use this process, or you run the risk of ending up with sticky hands and stained sheets! If you feel comfortable with your partner, you can even ask her to perform the operation – she’ll probably be happy to give you a little “helping hand.”
6 Do a dress rehearsal before the main show
This is one of the most effective tactics that many men use: masturbate a few hours before having intercourse. This will “reset your system,” reduce sexual tension, and desensitize your body to the point where it is more difficult to achieve the same state of arousal during sex.
The downside of this, however, is thatyou need to know in advance if you are going to have sex or not – but you don’t always know when you’re going to get lucky. So if you’re going out or have a date, don’t hesitate to “prepare” as necessary to set the odds in your favor.
You now have the tools to last longer in bed and hold yourself back during sex. Feel free to give us feedback on these techniques via comments on the blog. I hope Iwas able to enlighten you, and I wish you more sexual fulfillment.
See you soon for a new article!